Joke Pile #418




Things I think I thought recently:

I think that the day after Thanksgiving should be renamed Thanksgave Day.

I think that Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and Giving Tuesday naturally lead to What-Have-I-Done Wednesday!

I think that little kids wonder why people go shopping on Black Friday when Santa delivers gifts for free on Christmas.

I think that that when it goes from 60 degrees to mid-teens in a single day, swearing is the only appropriate response.

I think that battery powered holiday twinkle lights are called that because the batteries wear out in a twinkle,

I think that if Air BnB existed back in the day, Mary and Joseph would have still been out of luck in finding accommodations on Christmas Eve.

I think you should never put the Instahorse before the Instacart.

I think it is hard to relinquish control when you haven't even linquish-ed it in the first place,.

I was thinking it was a shame that my favorite sweater shrunk in the dryer. I thought short and soft about that.

I think that balls and strikes data about baseball should be called "umpirical".
Anecdotal information, I think, is a whole other story.

I think it is obvious but so are many other words.

I thought that the best way I could spend my time was along these lines. My wife suggested, it would be better if I spent my time along the lines of getting on a plane going somewhere warm.

I think that if ever there was a time to be beholden, an apiarist has already done so.

I used to think that fortitude was the attitude that forty year-olds are expected to have.

I thought how come the post office is so mail-dominated?

I think that the new weight-loss program I'm on is killing me very, very slowly.

 
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