Joke Pile #377

 It's a punderful day so let's get to it...


It poured down with so much thunder and lightning the other day that it scared me. It was a rain of terror.

The opera singer was so broke and he was hitting up everyone he knew for a tenor.

The statistician was the hit of the potluck with his Slopey Joe sandwiches.

Tina Turner used to require submarine sandwiches in her concert contracts. However, once the promoter was too generous and provided way more subs than were necessary. So, Tina called up her road manager and asked him to speak to the promoter. "Tell him," she said, "we don't need another hero."

Numbers were hard for George the ceramicist. Every time he added up receipts for sales that included a plate or bowl, he'd get a different result. He was bad at add-dish-in.

Then there was the experimental scientist whose scientific spouse was shrunken and inserted into a subject's body to explore the human body. Sadly, they were never seen again, but the scientist suspects his love will not be in vein.

How are cattle rustlers like coffee? One contains caffeine and the other is a calf fiend.

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