Joke #347

 

When it comes to weather, you get what you get, "weather" or not you like it.

Why is the last thing on my mind the first thing I think of?

I used to think an allegory was what a crime scene in an alleyway might look like.

There may be no crying in baseball, but watching the Cubs play lately has made me tear up.

I think that while the eyes are the window to the soul, the heels are also the window to the soles.


If life gives you both auditory loss and herring, should you make herring-ade?

Levitation: when the thought of going on vacation makes you laugh?

The number of people in an alternative metal/funk metal/experimental rock band is a Primus number.

Based on my experience with Origami, I think it should be called O-you-got-me wanting to pull my hair out.

I've been priced out of the Consumer Price Index.

Everyone is looking for someone to blame for inflation, his name is Stuart Nesmith.

If you hire an actress from the musical "Chicago" to kill somebody for you, is that murder by Roxie? 

If you think there is nothing matters but people named Neil, are you nihilistic?





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