If it's Thursday, it must be riddled with riddles.
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: A skunk drinking a Bloody Mary.
Q: What does a dog say when it goes to sleep?
A: Goodnight tail, I'll see you in the morning.
Q: What's the difference between a grotto and a catacomb?
A: You can't find out if your cat has fleas with a grotto.
Q: How do you prevent road rage?
A: Stay away from me on the highway!
Q: What would you call it if Dolly Parton and a UPS driver hooked up?
A: Parton parcel of something bigger than the both of them.
Q: What do you call a bloodsucking pest on the moon?
A: Lunatic.
Q: When is the best time to stop work in Germany?
A: Nine!
Q: Where is the best place to get a haircut?
A: On your head.
Q: When do you know you've had enough?
A: After reading this.
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