Joke #312

 It is Monday morning and Fern woke up with a  distinct smell of rotting meat in her throbbing head and no memory of the night before. She looked around her and with blurry vision saw some furry animals staring at her in the distance. She was on a floor of straw and her clothes are disheveled.

A man in khaki work clothes came into view and with a lilting accent said "Good Mornin', Luv, I brought you some coffee" and handed her a mug.

She accepted the cup and tried to piece together the night before and how she wound up here with this man, albeit not a bad-looking man in what appeared to be some sort of a barn. As she sipped the coffee, one of the animals came up to her and licked her face with his very wet tongue. 

"Ew," she exclaimed! 

"Oh, that is Bertie--he's a lover not a fighter, that one," said the man raking up the straw.

"Okay, can you help me out here?" 

He looked at her and said, "I'll try." 

"How did I get here?"

"Well, your car is parked here, so I'll guess you drove," he said.

"Did we...," she asked?

"Did we what, " he replied?

"You know."

"Oh no, we certainly did not," he laughed.

"Well, that's a relief," she said, "but how did I end up here in this pile of straw?"

"You clearly don't remember this, because you were pretty hammered when you got here. But you came to the Pickleberry Circus last night and wanted to pet my lions during the middle of my act."

"Oh..." she said.

"Then you got in the cage with us."

"Oh no."

"Oh yes. But then you passed out and because you were in no condition to drive, I let you sleep with us in the lion enclosure. 

"Oh my God! I slept with lions?"

"Yep, Luv, you sure did. But I thought you would have at least remembered Bertie, he's the one whose mouth you put your head into last night."