A bicyclist who prided himself on having all the latest gear was day riding out in the county at a pretty good clip. All of a sudden a naked old guy on a rusty old bike came roaring past him like he was standing still. The cyclist couldn't believe it and sped up to catch up with him. But no matter how fast he pedaled, the old fellow just was that much faster.
Finally, the old guy slowed down a bit and the bicyclist pulled along side him. "Wow guy, you're really flying on that old bike of yours, what's your secret?"
The naked old guy, short of breath, wheezed, "My secret? You'd be going this fast too if your old lady was behind you in a pickup truck gunning for your ass 'cuz she caught you in bed with her sister."
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